A 5-Part Trauma Series: Trauma (PTSD) Symptoms and Treatment Depression

Part 2: Depression Burnout and Trauma

Trauma (PTSD) Depressive Symptoms: Introduction

This blog continues a 5-part series on trauma symptoms and treatment.

The 5 parts will include 1) Hypervigilance/Anxiety symptoms 2) Depressive symptoms 3) Avoidance/Dissociation symptoms 4) Physical/Somatic symptoms and finally 5) Treatment. Each piece will be released approximately every 2-3 weeks.

Trauma (PTSD) Depressive Symptoms: Anhedonia and Burnout

The experience of feeling depressed, depressive symptoms when related to trauma is both similar and different from a Major Depressive episode, which is why they can co-occur in a diagnostic profile.

I find that when depression is part of the trauma experience and aftermath it is either 1) a chemical burnout due to constant hypervigilance (see Part 1: Anxiety Trauma blog) or 2) feeling like it is impossible to get the life you crave (due to trauma symptoms).

When you are hypervigilant and live in a fear state with flashbacks and frequent triggering, it simply chemically drains the system. You end up exhausted, almost vegetative and unable to function. Negative thoughts and low self-worth inevitably follow.  These are depressive symptoms.

This can include what the mental health world calls anhedonia, simply put, you can’t seem to enjoy anything. You can be with your fav people, doing the most interesting things, and feel absolutely nothing. This may lead to feeling disconnected and flawed.

We are primarily motivated by chemicals released from a reward system that tells us that we enjoy something and want to repeat it. So what if this doesn’t happen? Of course, you can feel miserable, abnormal and unmotivated and experience depressive symptoms.

Trauma (PTSD) Depressive Symptoms: Distorted Negative Thoughts

The hardest negative thoughts are beliefs about the self, distorted thoughts around the trauma(s) blaming ourselves or others (that are not objectively culpable). These thoughts then become more generalized, core thoughts on how we feel about ourselves and others.

Examples are:

No one is safe.

I am unsafe and worthless.

I do not deserve love and care, empathy, comfort.

People are broken and self-centred, they can’t meet my needs.

Is this hard to read? Distorted thoughts are part of depressive symptoms. They are distorted as they are too extreme and overarching, not fitting all people and situations. They lack balance and need to be healed.

Trauma (PTSD) Depressive Symptoms: Self-Sabotage Destructiveness

When we are struggling with low self-worth and just trying to feel something (numbness is uncomfortable) due to depressive symptoms, a self-destructive component can enter our world.

Addictive behaviours can include alcohol, drugs, food, shopping, almost anything can be addictive to numb or even just an attempt to feel OK. Of course, there are daily functioning concerns and health issues that follow.

Sabotage refers to a combination of low self-worth and fear of vulnerability with other people.

So we can sabotage a relationship when it is going well, don’t trust it.

We wait for the other side of a person or relationship, the agitation builds and we sabotage to feel a sense of control over the seemingly inevitable downfall.

We can fall into a pattern of sabotaging many good things, feeling we do not deserve them. 

We cheat on a loyal, supportive partner, don’t show up to a child’s special event and lose great jobs. It starts to feel like it will never get better, we’re too far gone.

Trauma (PTSD) Depressive Symptoms: Anger/Irritability

When our nervous system is in constant activation we can feel irritability due to various forms of overstimulation. It can feel uncontrollable.

When paired with the upset that life is hard and we are trying to avoid triggers and stuff down feelings, we can end up feeling angry at the world and ourselves.

This is often a destructive state that can only cause conflict with loved ones, a weakening of our resources when we need them the most.

Going to the gym can definitely help, but are you still angry all the time?

Upset at yourself for yelling at your kid yesterday? Don’t remember why?

Trauma (PTSD) Depressive Symptoms: Shame

After our anger and self-destructiveness has been a problem for awhile, we may feel our life is simply not working, feeling like it is in freefall. This affects how we feel about ourselves, feeling we are not showing up for our loved ones anymore, causing issues in their lives as well.

Shame is obviously related to distorted, negative thoughts but unique as well. This is why it was put in another, separate category.

Shame is a very physical, embodied self-loathing that can be constant, but usually is triggered sporadically. It is a heavy, horrible feeling that is hard to release and move on from.

The scary thing is that you begin to feel it is who you are.

I know this sounds unbelievable but shame is a trauma response as you are trying to have some sense of control over a horrible thing that was done to you/happened to you. If you blame yourself it can make the world feel less terrifying, especially if your abuse was perpetrated by a trusted parent or religious leader, etc. You are just trying to be ok.

But shame is also harmful. It is heavy and pervasive and leads to bad, self-destructive choices as we do not feel we deserve better. It keeps us in a self-loathing and destructive loop.

Conclusion and Next Steps

You know when you get overstimulated and overwhelmed? Then you disconnect and need to avoid people and feelings?

Stay tuned in a few weeks for the trauma symptoms we have placed in the dissociative category.

We will support you in self insight so you see yourself. We will then talk in some detail about treatment and feeling better.

Already ready to get help? MEET THE TEAM

Lisa S.